WAS, IS AND IS TO COME

I am really having a hard time letting the past go. I want to not feel like the past mistakes I have made define me and feel like they are going to control me and my future. I know that I need to accept my past, but it feels still so fresh and so like it is still happening. I need to quit telling myself that if I just can get "this" thing then I will be happy. I don't think God will give me any of those things until I figure out how to REALLY be happy without these things and just be happy with the life I have now. I need to remember that my happiness is found in the Lord. He will make me happy, not a house, or financial freedom. I want to be happy and enjoy the right now. Not feel like I cannot truly be happy until certain things happen. I need to find the joy in my life, the joy that I have right now. I love my husband, my daughter, my family, my friends, my church, my church family and especially MY GOD!!! I need to be happy in those things!!!! I want to have peace. Pray I find it soon!!!

Meddling

One of the words we use often in our Beth Moore bible studies when she starts asking very personal questions is MEDDLING. This is the word that God is doing to me every day! I am really realizing that God is really working on me. He is breaking me down(even though it's really hard) to help build me back up for his kingdom. I really feel lead to share my experiences with others and in hopes this could be a testimony to someone else who knows that God is shaking them up too! I am learning more and more every day that God is in control and I need to learn to let go and let him pilot my life. I need to trust that the more I live for him, the more he will fulfill the desires of my heart. God doesn't want me to feel like I am missing something in life, but I first need to learn how to be fulfilled in HIM! I hope that along this journey I can grow as a Christian and help others learn that too!!!